Sara Wasserbauer, M.D.

Science has found that only one thing can prevent baldness
...hair!

What do you call a bunch of bunnies hopping backwards?
A receding hare line.

The best thing about being bald is...
when her folks come home, all you have to do is straighten your tie.

What's the difference between an ape, an orphan, a prince, and a bald man?
An ape has a hairy parent, an orphan has nary a parent, a prince is an heir apparent, and a bald man has no hair apparent.

What did the bald man say when he got a comb for his birthday?
"Thanks, I'll never part with it!"

Jokes compliments of Clyde's Searchable Humor Archive


HAIR LOSS TREATMENT
 
Not satisfied with the results he got from his family doctor, a balding man sought out an alternative treatment for his hair loss. A friend referred him to a scientist who had been testing a chemical that showed great promise.

Within a week after taking the recommended dosage, a heavy growth of hair appeared on the bald man's scalp. He was very happy at first, but soon became alarmed when hair began to grow uncontrollably all over his body.

After two weeks, he returned to see the scientist. "What the hell did you give me?" he demanded.

"It was DNA from a Woolly Mammoth."
"Aha!" exclaimed the man. "That would explain the size of my balls!"


Doctor, doctor, can you give me something for my baldness? How about a few pounds of pig manure? Will that cure my baldness? No, but with that on your head no one will come near enough to notice you're bald.

Customer: Why did you take off so much hair? Barber: I didn't, nature beat me to it. 

A woman was cutting her husband's thinning hair, when their teenage son arrived home looking for a snack. She ofered a kiwifruit and tried to tempt him with its nutritious qualities. "It has more vitamin C than an orange," she remarked. "And more hair than Dad," added their son.

A bald man took a seat in a beauty parlour. "How can I help you ?" asked the stylist.

"I went for a hair transplant." the guy explained, "but I couldn't stand the thought of having any discomfort. If you can make my hair look like yours without causing me any discomfort, I'll pay you $5,000."

"No problem, " said the stylist, and she quickly shaved her head.

If a man is bald at the front, he is a thinker.

If he is bald at the back, he is sexy.

If he is bald from front to back - he thinks he is sexy.

Lots of men are losing their hair and most are very upset by that. But not all of them. I casually mentioned to Don one night that I thought he was going bald.

Don looked at me and said, "I am NOT going bald, I'm getting more head."

One day, a little girl is sitting and watching her mother do the dishes at the kitchen sink. She suddenly notices that her mother has several strands of white hair sticking out in contrast on her brunette head.

She looks at her mother and inquisitively asks, "Why are some of your hairs white, mom?"

Her mother replied, "Well, every time that you do something wrong and make me cry or unhappy, one of my hairs turns white."

The little girl thought about this revelation for a while, and then said, "Momma, how come *all* of grandma's hairs are white?"

BALD HEAD & WOODEN LEG

There's this man with a bald head and a wooden leg who gets invited to a fancy dress party.

He doesn't know what costume to wear to hide his head and his leg, so he writes to a fancy dress company to explain the problem.

A few days later he receives a parcel with a note:

"Dear Sir,
Please find enclosed a pirates outfit.
The spotted handkerchief will cover your bald head
and with your wooden leg you will be just right as a pirate".
The man thinks this is terrible because they have just
emphasized his wooden leg and so he writes a really
rude letter of complaint.

A week passes and he receives another parcel
and a note which says:

"Dear Sir, sorry about before,
please find enclosed a monks habit.
The long robe will cover your wooden leg
and with your bald head you will really look the part".

Now the man is really annoyed
since they have gone from emphasizing
his wooden leg to emphasizing his bald head
and he writes the company
a REALLY rude letter of complaint.

The next day he receives a small parcel
and a note which reads:

"Dear Sir,
Please find enclosed a jar of caramel.
Pour the jar of caramel over your bald head,
stick your wooden leg up you